Bombastic 'Mo

At least I still have my health

“Dear MR. GLASER:

Basic Health (BH) has reached it’s enrollment limit and cannot offer you coverage.  When space is available, you will be offered enrollment; you will receive instructions at that time.  If we know we will not be able to offer you coverage within 60 days, we will return any money you have sent.

If you applied for coverage through a sponsoring organization, we will notify your sponsor when space is available.  Contact your sponsoring organization if you have questions.

We expect to offer you enrollment soon; however, we cannot guarantee enrollment by a specific date.  Once you are scheduled for enrollment, you will receive a confirmation letter indicating when coverage will begin.

…

Sincerly, 

Basic Health”

Saddlebacking?

To Saddleback:

“Saddlebacking: sad•dle•back•ing \?sa-d?l-?ba-ki?\ vb [fr. Saddleback Church] (2009): the phenomenon of Christian teens engaging in unprotected anal sex in order to preserve their virginities

After attending the Purity Ball, Heather and Bill saddlebacked all night because she’s saving herself for marriage. Unfortunately her parents found out because they got santorum all over the sheets.”

Really Pittsburgh?

Guess there was nothing better to do.

Were the World Mine

I just got home after spending a glorious day busing around Seattle’s University Area, eating vegan pizzas and watching adorable gay films. Ok, one Pizza and one Film.

The film in question was Were the World Mine, a darling musical to the style of a Midsummer Night’s Dream. Although predictable (and what adaptation of Shakespeare isn’t?) and totally campy, the movie is heartwarming, well put together, and if my overuse of the word adorable will suffice… adorable.

Here’s the trailer for the movie.  Go see it soon, these indy films are never out long.

Google this!

I’ll admit, the post was somewhat inspired by my webhost, Senor Jonathan Edwards.

I was looking through my stats (that’s right audience, I know about you…) and one of the nifty things that is tracked is what Google searches have led people to your page.

Thanks to my amazing reporting on this teenage crazy of Sexting, my page is the first thing to show up if someone Google searches for “bombastic sex girl pictures”.  I’m not sure if this is really the type of site they are looking for.

On another side note, apparently someone can have “bombastic tits”.  That doesn’t really make sense to me.  Are they pretentious?  Or perhaps they are simply over-inflated.

The more you know.

Powerful

This video, in response to the some of the religious right’s recent claims of Christian-Bashing, or Christ-a-phobia is really good. It also kind of hurts.

Fair warning, there is some graphic stuff.

Another Hate Crime on Capitol Hill

A Tacoma man has been charged with a hate crime after threatening a woman on Seattle’s Capitol Hill.  Alfred Salway, age 52, allegedly confronted a woman on January 15th and threatened to stab her in the eye.

Police reports indicate Salway yelled “Did you hear me lesbian,” followed by “I’m going to hurt you lesbian” and “Lesbian, I’m going to get you.”

The woman, whose sexuality was undisclosed, ran from Salway and he gave chase.  The police were called, and Salway was arrested minutes later.

King County Prosecutors charged Salway with malicious harrassment, Washington state’s hate-crime law.

Salway, who has previously been convicted of 11 counts of assault, is being held in King County Jail under $50,000 bail.

Anyone down to Drink Liberally?

A new friend brought my attention to the group Drinking Liberally.  From their website:

“An informal, inclusive progressive social group. Raise your spirits
while you raise your glass, and share ideas while you share a pitcher.
Drinking Liberally gives like-minded, left-leaning individuals a place
to talk politics. You don’t need to be a policy expert and this isn’t a
book club - just come and learn from peers, trade jokes, vent
frustration and hang out in an environment where it’s not taboo to talk
politics.

Bars are democratic spaces - you talk to strangers, you share booths,
you feel the bond of common ground. Bring democratic discourse to your
local democratic space - build democracy one drink at a time.

While drinking liberally, always remember to drink responsibly, and make
liberal use of designated drivers. Drinking and driving is reckless and
irresponsible, like a neocon war or corporatist tax cut. Liberals, don’t
do it.”

They have groups throughout Washington, including my usual haunts, Seattle and Olympia.

Anyone down?

Google: A Modern Day Super Hero

Shortly after Google proved it could out-perform Sherlock Holmes, the company of innovative geniuses has caught another bunch of “crooks”, this time marijuana farmers in Sweden.

The drugs were hidden from sight by large corn stalks, but when the officers looked at the farmer’s address on Google Earth, they were able to easily distinguish the marijuana plants.  The farmers have allegedly sold at least 7.7 tons of marijuana since 2004.

On a side note: Google employees have their own public Picasa web album (another free service hosted by Google).  Their pics around the office make me a little jealous.  They look like the happiest nerds I’ve ever seen.

Lesbian to Lead Iceland

Sorry… third gay story of the day.

Johanna Siguroardottir, an openly gay woman, appears to be the most likely candidate for the prime minister of Iceland.  Geir Haarde, the previous prime minister, stepped down recently amid the country’s financial crisis and a battle with cancer.

Beyond just being the first gay prime minister, Siguroardottir would also be the first woman in the position.  She currently has a 73% approval rating with Iceland’s populace.

“If she is gay, that is not an issue at all,” Olafur Sigurdsson, deputy chief of mission at the Icelandic Embassy told On Top Magazine.  “We are very liberal in that sense. It has never been an issue for her as a politician.”

Court Rules Private Schools can Expel Students for Acting Gay

The Fourth District Court of Appeals in Riverside, California ruled that California Lutheran High School had the right to expel students based on their perceived sexual orientation.

Two girls were expelled during their junior year of high school for “conducting themselves in a manner consistent with being lesbians”, an incredibly ambiguous statement.  Did they wear too much plaid?  Drive U-hauls to school?  Or were they just cheerleaders?

The investigation began when another student told a teacher that one of the girls listed her sexual orientation as bisexual on her MySpace page.  The other girl listed “Not Sure”.  Even worse, there was a photograph of the girls hugging.

“[The principal] just looked at me like I was a disease and I was so wrong,” said one of the girls, whose names were kept anonymous.  “He got very close to me and he said, ‘Have you ever touched [the other girl] in . . . any inappropriate ways? And he looked me up and down when he asked that,” reports the LA Times. 

The lawyer for the girls intends to take the court to the California Supreme Court.

Man, high school sucks.  As shitty as this is, it’s probably in the girls’ best interests that they got out before being completely brainwashed.

All those years… it was the Pepsi

The American Family Association has it’s knickers all up in a twist over Pepsi’s latest commercial which, as always, “promotes the gay lifestyle” (emphasis added).  The commercial, which is only airing in the United Kingdom (which throws into question why the American Family Association has any say whatsoever) features a guy out with his friends who suddenly gets the chutzpah to go gay after drinking a Pepsi Max (a low calorie, sugar-free alternative to real Pepsi).

You can judge for yourself whether it’s promoting the homosexual lifestyle.  I’m not sure which lifestyle the American Family Association is picketing, but the Gay Lifestyle I know sure as hell doesn’t drink non-alcoholic drinks at a bar.  Just saying.

Pepsi has a pretty decent track record with the GLBTQ community, and this isn’t the first time they’ve been boycotted by the AFA.  PepsiCo donated $500,000 to both the Human Rights Commission (HRC) and Parents and Friends of Lesbian and Gays (PFLAG).

“On November 15, AFA received a condescending letter from Paul Boykas, director of public policy, in which he refused to address Pepsi’s support of the homosexual agenda,” read an AFA action alert.

Personally, this revelation all of a sudden makes sense out of my life.  As a child, I was HOOKED on Pepsi (although none of this sugar-free crap).  Before I finally kicked the habit, I was drinking 8 to 9 cans a day.  I finally did the math, and that was like 1,700 calories a day from sugar.  (I was also a chubby bunny.)  If only we had access to this cool, refreshing Pepsi Max back then.

Damn you homosexual agenda!

But on a lighter note, I’m inspired by PepsiCo’s fair and logical approach to marketing (although I’m not sure we’d ever see this ad in the United States).  Perhaps it’s time to start a campaign to replace any and all Coca Cola in bars with Pepsi.  Coke doesn’t really have much of a track record.

Higher Brow than Bloody Chickens

Warning: Probably Not Safe for Work.

‘Veggie Love’: PETA’s Banned Super Bowl Ad

Obama’s Stimulus Package: Spending Money to Make Money

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about our economy lately.  It’s kind of inevitable, considering the straits we’re in.

Obama is working really hard to get Republicans in line behind his recent stimulus package.   And it’s a hard fight to win.  I’ve heard talk around the water cooler that they’re not too into spending.

To his credit, Obama and his think tank have clearly put a lot of thought into the measure.  The 13 page summary of the stimulus package clearly lays out where Obama wants to spend this money, and the reasoning behind each and every expenditure.   Although the immediate purpose of the package is to increase spending to create jobs, it appears that the long term investments will save money and generate income.

Below are the seven core goals of the stimulus package, as well as a few highlights of each.

• Modernize our Energy Systems. $11 billion to create a more efficient energy grid, $6.2 billion to help weatherize low-income homes, and $8 billion to create new sources of renewable energy.
• Fund needed improvements to Science and Technology.  $6 billion will be invested in expanding access to broadband Internet, of which the stimulus package claims “for every dollar invested in broadband the economy sees a ten-fold return on that investment”
• Improve and Create Better Transit Options.  Obama wants to spend $30 billion on highway and bridge construction projects, and a measly $10 billion on mass-transit options.  Of course, I live in the city where mass transit is viable.  The majority of this country is not a city.
• Reemphasizing Education.  $20 billion dedicated to technology and energy upgrades in schools, and another $1 billion in computer and science labs, as well as trainings for teachers who don’t understand 1337 speak.  $16 billion will be dedicated to student loans, to assist those who have gone back to school after failing to find employment.
• Lower Health Care Costs.  $20 billion to create electronic medical records, $3 billion to promote preventative care, $1.5 billion to expand Community Health Centers to provide care to the uninsured, and $600 million to train new doctors to “prepare our country for universal healthcare“.
• Provide Relief to the Unemployed.   $27 billion to extend unemployment benefits, $30.3 billion to extend COBRA to those losing their work-sponsored insurance, and $4.2 billion to help low-income communities purchase and rehabilitate foreclosed properties.
• Save Public Employees.  $120 billion to school districts to prevent tax increases on the middle class without laying off teachers.

After reading through the entire package, I’m impressed.  There’s not a single line I’d disagree with, although even I’m a little nervous about the price.  I’ve always maintained a strange fanaticism with mathematics, but I can’t even begin to imagine what $550,000,000,000 dollars would look like.

If you’re making Washington’s minimum wage of $8.55, it would take you 64.3 billion hours to make this money.  If that number’s too big to picture, how about 7.3 million years.  Better hope Starbucks offers overtime….

Ok, those numbers are scary.  Perhaps it’ll help to put it in perspective with our population of 305,697,065.  If each of us footed an equal share, it’d be a one time payment of $1,799.  Shit, that’s a months mortgage.  I’d gladly pay up.

“THE U.S. GOVERNMENT IS A NAZI DICTATORSHIP USING NAZI PSEUDO-SCIENCE TO PERSECUTE INNOCENT PEOPLE!”

I stumbled across this link while reading a great story on a new smoking ban in California.  That momentous step forward aside, I wanted to draw your attention to this outstanding, upright citizen’s website.

http://www.smokershistory.com/

Titled “The Conspiracy against Tobacco”, the site is one long, rambling rant against Anti-Smokers.  Someone needs their nicotine fix.  Some of my personal favorites:

“For six decades we, the American people, have been victimized by deliberate, knowing scientific fraud, perpetrated by the American Cancer Society and its accomplices, and funded by their corrupt lackeys in Congress, whose goal is totalitarian dictatorship over every detail of our personal lives!”

And of course:

“Worthless Congresspussies Still Bend Over for the Anti-Smokers!

These brain-dead, spineless pieces of human junk should be holding hearings exposing the anti-smokers’ deliberate, systematic, and decades-long use of defective studies that ignore infection, to falsely blame smoking and lifestyle for diseases that are really caused by infection - not sniveling about slippery slopes like a bunch of stupid little children.”

If anything I ever create comes across this ugly and completely incomprehensible, please put a stop to me.

“The health fascists turned America into a giant Tuskegee Experiment!
Infectious diseases are the leading preventable causes of death in the United States and throughout the world, and always have been. By their obstruction of the truth, the anti-smoking conspirators have caused the needless deaths and suffering of uncounted millions. They have compounded their crimes by persecuting the innocent, and stealing their victims’ money to line their own over-privileged pockets, under the pretext of the Big Lie that smoking is an economic burden to society. Morally, the anti-smokers deserve to be prosecuted for crimes against humanity, and hanged like the loathsome criminals that they are.
We must have REVENGE! REVENGE! REVENGE! for everything they’ve done to us! Never forgive and never forget their crimes!”